Real Talk
Let’s be honest for a second:
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, overbooked, and over it…
.…that’s on you.
Ouch, I know. But stay with me.
I say that with love and understanding, having picked this topic because last month nearly chewed me up and spat me out.
The month started strong: exciting business yeses, lots of travel, great gigs.
Then another yes.
And another.
Somewhere in the middle of October (which was already shaping up to be a wild ride), I realized I had created my very own steamroller of chaos, and it was flattening me.
I was keeping up, but barely.
One morning, on a desperate phone call with my mom, I tried to explain the situation: “We only get a certain number of energy points per day.”
I had said yes to things Iknewwould require a lot of those points, and honestly, I was prepared for that.
I planned for that.
What I didn’t plan for was the margin.
The buffer.
Breathing room.
I left myself zero space for anything unpredictable.
And of course, the unpredictable showed up. It’s life! And I have kids.
Kids needed help with things that weren’t on the schedule – YOU GET ENERGY POINTS.
Family stuff got deeper – YOU GET ENERGY POINTS.
Business needs popped up that couldn’t wait – YOU GET ENERGY POINTS.
And none of it was the simple “Can you hop on a quick call?” kind of stuff. These were the kind of deep cuts that were going to bleed out if I didn’t stop and take care of them immediately.
Meanwhile, my energy points were stretched so thin they were practically transparent.
And that’s when the overwhelm flipped my whole world upside down.
Real talk: setting boundaries before burnout is essential if you want to lead well, work well, and show up well. Otherwise, you’re stuck in survival mode, constantly repairing, catching up, and apologizing to the people you love because you’re running on fumes.
You cannot be everything to everyone. And you shouldn’t try.
(This is me, speaking directly to me.)
My Personal Truth:
I am a Yes Man.
Can we figure this out at the last minute? Yes.
Do I have a fix? A way to make it better? Yes.
Need a solution yesterday? Yes.
The boots-on-the-ground problem solver identity is woven into the fabric of who I am. There is beauty in that. Until there isn’t.
Because if I don’t choose my yeses carefully, everyone pays for it.
My ability to rest and reset disappears.
I become the mom who snaps over Monday-morning-lunchbox mold.
(Gross, right?)
I become the wife who gets irrationally irritated by my husband’s chewing.
(Purely hypothetical… maybe.)
When I am frustrated, exhausted, and stretched thin, it’s my fault.
Swallow that pill.
If I had set boundaries sooner, things could have been smoother.
Not just for me, but for everyone in my circle of influence.
THE LESSON LEARNED
Boundaries are not selfish. They are key to sustainability.
No one else will set boundaries for you.
If you don’t want to say yes to every committee, party, or project, you are allowed to say NO.
If your weekends are full and you’re still saying, “Sure, I can squeeze that in,” you can decide to stop that pattern.
And research backs this up:
Employees who set clear work-life boundaries report 40% higher well-being and 21% less burnout than those who don’t.
(Source: Gallup, State of the Global Workplace Report, 2023)
You cannot lead well from resentment or exhaustion.
Boundaries protect your peace, your people, and your purpose.
A Reminder as we Enter “All the Things” Season
Back-to-back events.
Family plans.
Class parties.
End-of-year deadlines.
All the cooking (or buying… seriously, no judgement).
Every yes you give means a no somewhere else.
Maybe to a clean house that calms your anxiety.
Maybe to smooth mornings with your kids.
Maybe to the simple joy of actually enjoying the holiday season.
Your yeses shape your peace.
Choose them wisely.
Your Homework:
As the holiday chaos picks up, take a breath and ask yourself:
What boundaries do I need to set, mentally, emotionally, or physically, to protect my peace this season?
Then actually set them.
Say them.
Write them.
Hold them.
Boundaries are not walls. They’re guardrails, designed to keep you on your road to joy, balance, and purpose.
You deserve to enjoy this season, not just survive it.
Need a reset before the rush?
Check out my Leadership Level-Up Journal. It’s your daily space to quickly reflect, reset, and refocus.
And if you aren’t already, come hang out with me on Instagram for weekly encouragement and tools to support your leadership journey.
Thank you for being here.